Lifetime of Death
by Genesis Development
Summary: A story about love, live, depression, justice, death, and God. Listen as Shinigami, Nami recollects events from her human life brought on by the Death Note. Listen as she talks about her view on Kira.
1. Gray Eyes

Lifetime of Death

_So, I got a couple of nasty reviews from my previous story Conquered Heart's. So, instead I am writing a Death Note story. Anything that is not completely explained in the first chapter will be explained in **LATER CHAPTERS. THERE IS A REASON IT IS NOT EXPLAINED!** I don't mean to be rude but it is true._ _If the character does not seem lively, it is because she is not supposed to be. I am the _one wr_iting this story, if you have a problem with the character or storyline then write your own! I however, appreciate constructive criticism. **CONSTRUCTIVE ONLY! **That being said now we can move on to the Disclaimer._

_ Genesis: I do not own Death Note, or any of it's character's. I do own my OC and my plot.  
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Please, listen to my story. It is a sad and unfulfilled one, but I want you to hear it. It is about love, justice, death, and God. My name is Namida Kuroya. My first name means "tears," and my last name means "Black Star."

This is my story about falling in love with 2 of the world's greatest detectives. This is my story of how, in the end, I wasn't able to be with either of them. How, in the end, I was the one who died.

Yes, you are hearing this story from a dead girl. No, I am not a ghost, or a demon, or a vampire either. I am something much worse. I am a God of Death, I am a Shinigami. These are my memoirs, this is my story of how I fell in love with Light Yagami, and L Lawliet. This is my story from when I was a human. This is my story from when I first discovered Death Note. This is my story from when I discovered life. This is my story from when I discovered love.

So, will you listen?

I see you have chosen to listen. As I stated before, my name is/was Namida Kuroya. When I was a human I had black hair and gray eyes. I was one of the prettier girls. People were always scared of my eyes. They were gray for god's sake! What child has grey eyes? People always thought that they meant I was empty. Even black eyes would have been better that grey eyes. At least black usually meant you were angry or had no soul. But grey? Grey was nothing….

I was clinically depressed, that was one of my major flaws. I found no joy in life…life to me was empty. A dark hole you could never climb your way out of. One problem after another, I know what you're thinking, and no I'm not goth. I've never tried to kill myself, and I hate horror movies with lots of blood and gore. I also can't stand vampires.

Personally I found that it was somewhat ironic that I was the one who _did _get dragged into this horror story. I had essentially, a lonely life before Light Yagami entered with the Death Note. More specifically, before the Death Note entered my life.

In high school I was a loner. I had no friends. Not even that one best friend that other girls sometimes had. I had no childhood friends either. The only things I held any value to whatsoever were my books, and my studies. _You, _I suppose would describe me as one of those typical intellectuals. One of those people who think they are so smart that they push everyone away. Rather like Hamlet in Shakespeare. But, no I'm not like that…I _did _want a friend. I did want people to like me. People just didn't understand…

The day the Death Note entered my life it was changed for good. My fate was already predetermined the minute that Light Yagami committed his first murder. That day I had seen the Death Note fall from the sky as well. I was in Light's class , I sat directly behind him. Not that he ever noticed. There had been times where I had often wondered about what my life would be like if Ryuk hadn't been bored.

Thank God he was.

After I saw the Death Note fall, I went up to the teacher so I could get my lavatory pass signed. Instead I went out side on to the school grounds and picked up the Death Note. I finished reading through the contents with a sigh. It was just a stupid notebook. I wish I'd known then how wrong I was. I wish I'd known then, how many people, including myself would die unjustly.

_Thank you for reading through my second attempts at a story! I really appreciate any reviews you have to offer :) I also apologize if my beginning rant sounded angry. I just wanted to make certain matters clear with those occasional reviewer's who like to instigate arguments._


	2. Beginning by Death

Pt.2

_Hi, it's me again, umm so just wanted to say that here's another chapter! And that I do not own Death Note or any of it's character's. If I did I wouldn't be doing this disclaimer. The only thing I do own is of course, my OC, and my plotline._

Story Start

After school was officially over, I began to walk towards my house. I lived alone as well, I had no parents or even grandparents. No family members to speak of at any rate. My parents had been murdered when I was younger by random street gang members. Till last year when I turned 18, I had been moved among random Foster homes. My parent's had left me a sufficient amount of money so that I would be comfortable for the rest of my life.

As I was walking, I noticed Light Yagami headed in the same direction, with the Death Note sticking out of his bag. So I walked up to him.

"It's fake you know." I spoke plainly and clearly. Light turned around and looked at me.

"Excuse me?" he asked protectively clutching his bag.

"The Death Note, it's sticking out of your bag plain as day." I pointed at the half stuck out notebook. A look of realization came into his face as he stuffed it hurriedly into his school bag.

"Thanks, but why do you think it's fake?" he asked me as we resumed walking.

"Honestly? Whose ever heard of a killer notebook? A notebook that can kill someone so to speak, it can't be real. It's probably as real as Ghosts, or aliens, or even God, Heaven, or Hell for that matter."

"Don't you believe in God?" Light paused, absorbing my words.

"No, if God existed why does he let criminals and street gang members get away with taking innocent lives? Why do criminals go unpunished? If that's the case...Then the world is just rotten." I finished bitterly. Light stopped in his tracks and really looked at me. He attempted to decipher whatever was beneath my gray eyes, and saw that I really believed what I said.

"That's funny, I've been thinking some of those same thing's myself lately. So, why did you pick it up?" he asked steadily.

"I was bored, depressed, hoped something good would come out of it. What does it matter? The point is I did. Why did you pick it up?" I countered with an equally calm demeanor.

"I was bored, oh I don't believe I've introduced myself. Light Yagami," he pronounced holding out his hand. I shook it solemnly before responding.

"I know I sit behind you in class. Namida Kuroya," I smiled tentatively. I saw the slight shock in his face moments before I reached my house.

"Well this is me, let me know if you ever feel like talking again Yagami-kun." I said carelessly.

"Wait! You live two houses down from my house." Light pointed out smirking as he did so.

"That's nice to know."Was my bland reply, I watched his smirk grow into a charming, persuasive grin.

"So, would you mind walking to school together tomorrow then?"

"Alright, but don't expect me to wait for you." I said just loudly enough. As I closed my door, I watched Light walk away.

I felt somewhat accomplished. I'd talked to someone, and they hadn't called me a freak. If anything, Light seemed to agree with me. Perhaps, certain humans weren't so hopeless after all.

Later that night, after I'd finished my homework I was watching T.V. I watched as the man holding all the Hostages died. The reporter's said he had clutched his chest suddenly and dropped to the floor. I knew that Light had decided to use the Death Note. It was real.

"Well, well, Yagami…let the massacre begin." I laughed to myself slightly. Now all I had to do was wait for Light to threaten me into silence somehow. Since I was the only other who knew about the Death Note.

_Well, there's the second chapter. Please review with any tips on how to improve. As I've said before, __**CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM ONLY.**__ Thanks a lot and please continue to read my chapters as I update _


	3. Happy Discoveries

Ch.3 Happy Discovery's

Light's PoV

It had been four days since I discovered the Death Note, and met Namida Kuroya. She was right she was in every single one of my classes. Plus she sat behind me in homeroom.

I had to be careful how much I looked at her though. If other people started noticing that _I_noticed her, they would as well. I'm not going to lie to myself she was beautiful. I couldn't pin my finger on why I hadn't noticed her ever before. I'm pretty sure it was the fact of how ghostlike she was. She never drew attention to herself, not in the way some of the other annoying, less beautiful girls attempted to anyhow.

We had gotten a fragile routine together since I met her. We went through the school day normally, both of us acting like we didn't know each other. Then when it was time to go home we would walk, and talk then. I was the one who did most of the talking though. It unnerved me that she could be so silent, it was almost like she was ignoring _me._

Anyhow, back to the Death Note. I had started trading off the death note with Namida, sending her instructions, on how to get the lists of criminals from my Father's Computer. She was super smart, so far she has only had it for two nights, but she has gotten more done than I did in one night. She was a much faster writer than I was.

Tonight I told her that I was going to introduce her to my family. It would be more efficient for me, were they comfortable with her as well. Then she would be able to come and go into our house, into my room, where I could discuss things with her that needed to be done. Naturally, she would pose as my girlfriend.

I looked to my side as we were walking. She was still there, she always seemed so frail.

"Namida-san, how would you like to meet my family tonight?" a small flash of surprise betrayed her as she looked at me.

"Um, sure, any particular reason why?" she asked cautious, even after five days she didn't cave to the normality feeling of trust that other people usually did.

"It would be more efficient, as such I need you from now on to pretend to be my girlfriend. It will only be in Public of course, and mainly for show." I chuckled to myself, not that she had any choice otherwise. She knew it as well, so she merely nodded.

"Of course, Light-kun, I will do my best." She answered her voice lilting like a child's on every word. I could feel my self beginning to be far too much attracted to her. I had to focus on my goal to cleanse the world of all evil. Where I could then become a new God!

Namida's PoV

When we arrived in Light's home a little while later a cheery woman greeted us saying she was Light's mother.

"Hello, dear, it's such a pleasant to meet you! You are absolutely gorgeous! Just like a geisha, don't you think Sayu-chan?" she turned toward's Light's little sister who nodded happily.

"Light-kun, you sure got a beautiful girlfriend! Just like my brother of course!" she exclaimed all smiles. I found my self smiling back at her. She reminded me of a little butterfly. Cute, and possibly annoying after a while, but still something you just couldn't stomp on or hurt. I found myself Jealous of Light.

He had a very loving family. While mine were dead, it really wasn't fair. It made me wonder still, his reasons for being so adamant about the Death Note.

"It is a pleasure to meet you to Mrs. Yagami! Sayu-san. _Thank__you,_for allowing me into your lovely home on such short notice." I bowed, I spoke mostly in the formal Kyoto dialect. I had been in Geisha training, despite my complications of being in Foster Homes. The mother of the Okiya, I was part of, never adopted me. She said it was because my demeanor was too cold towards the customer's. My eyes were gray, and she also called me lifeless to top it all off.

"Wow, such polite manner's! You are welcome into our house anytime my dear!" she smiled warmly at me. I felt inclined to give her a hug, having no reason to do so, and feeling it would be inappropriate, I did not.

"Light-kun talks about you all the time, so when he asked me whether I wanted to meet you or not, I was very excited." I smiled, I felt horrible lying through my teeth, all these new emotions I was developing were incredible to me. At the same time, underneath them all I felt a growing Hatred for Light.

"That's so sweet of you! Oh, I don't believe I've gotten your name yet dear?" she asked warmly.

"Of course, I'm forgetting my manner's my name is Namida Kuroya. You may call me Nami if you like." I spoke bowing yet again.

"What a unique name! Light, she really is a treasure! Oh, your father will be home late again."

" I see, mother I am taking Nami-chan up to my room to study, all right?" Light asked dragging me along behind him. I waved to Sayu, who waved back before we went upstair's.

"Light! I will bring up some snacks for you two ok?" she called up after us.

"Thank you, mother!" Light called

Light pulled me into his room and closed the door behind us, I gasped when I saw what looked like a monster, or rather, a bad copy of a fallen angel.

It chuckled.

This was one of the God's of Death.


End file.
